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| pep talk to self |
| 08.21.04 (7:00 pm) [edit] |
I’m a little on the stressed side tonight and I’m not entirely sure why. Well, I guess I do. I’m back in school, classes have started and I’m terrified that I’m not going to do well. It’s irrational because on my first assignments I’ve gotten 100%, I’m still dedicated and sure of my intelligence and motivation, but the fear is still there. I think a part of the fear has to do with the fact I just rearranged my schedule after getting transfer credits evaluated. I’m now taking 6 classes for a total of 16 credit hours. The 16 credits aren’t the problem it’s concentrating on 6 classes that makes me a bit nervous. But the more I do, the quicker I get my degree. Intelligence-wise, I know the stuff shouldn’t be that difficult. But there isn’t much room for error and none for slacking even a little with so much homework and so little time for the classes. Keeping track of them all I think will be harder than the actual work. It’s tempting for me to jump ahead in my first class, but that really does me no good considering after the first few assignments will be group work and my next classes don’t start for a few weeks. Not too mention, getting ahead doesn’t help me as much as it hurts me. I have had a tendency to lose track of where I’m ahead or what I’ve done and it makes staying on track for the long haul difficult. However, I know this, I recognize it and am going to fix that. I just need to take a deep breath and relax and understand that nothing comes easily in life and I am going to have to work constantly for the next 1.5 to 2 years for the degree I want. I can do that. Deep breath – in with the good, out with the bad. Kids in school next week will mean study time for me, then I should still have time for myself when they go to bed. Although that doesn’t leave room for that job I wanted. School first, job later. I just have to prioritize and not stress myself out to no end. Baby steps will get me there without the danger the giant leaps have. And yes, I know I’m pep talking myself. I need it. One day at a time and for tonight, my homework due tomorrow is done turned in and graded at 100%. Next homework is not due until next Sunday so I will pace myself and get in a pattern of doing things that will help me in the long run, because it’s the long run that is my goal, not the short term.
I think I covered all the cliché pep talk items. Why am I still stressed? Ok, instead of typed pep talk to self, bubble bath and bed…maybe that will help.
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